Sunday, July 8, 2012

What is this blog?

Abraham Lincoln once said that “truth is generally the best vindication against slander.”

For some time, members of my family have been the targets of a barrage of false statements made by one Susan Stanton, who is my father’s ex-wife and the mother of one of my brothers (technically, their son is my half-brother). She has said things that are not merely false, but outrageously false, and are intended to paint a picture of our lives versus her life that is the exact opposite of reality. Many of her statements are personal attacks that deliberately defame the character of whomever she is referring to, so in my opinion they are slander when she speaks them and libel when she writes them.

Much of her targeting stems from her divorce from my father, John Stanton III; in other words, from their private issues. Yet she has chosen to lash out at people who are not involved. She has chosen to tell falsehoods about those people and to drag them into her own self-made drama.

Up to now, Susan Stanton has waged her one-sided war both in private, via harassing phone calls and electronic messages, and in public via newspapers and television. The public side of her war has mostly been aimed at my father, and has involved the publishing of some selectively chosen facts; however, the private side of her war has been very much aimed at the rest of us who have nothing to do with their private issues. Her behavior crossed the line a long time ago, but her most recent tactic of aggression was the last straw, and she no longer has the luxury of punching people without them punching back.

Last week she posted public comments on one of my blogs that did not stop at defamation and harassment, but constituted a direct threat. On the same day she posted those comments, she also sent defamatory, harassing, and threatening messages to my wife on Facebook.

There are reasons why no one in my family has previously responded to Susan Stanton’s attacks. For one, we have chosen to take the high road because we have done nothing wrong and have no desire for conflict, so why stoop to what seemed like a petty tantrum of mud-slinging? And more importantly, we are concerned about the welfare of my brother.

He is 13 years old now, was younger when all this began, and his mother has intentionally estranged him from his father. There is no doubt that whatever she tells him about his father (and us) in the privacy of their California home must have a negative effect of his young mind, but my father has always been of the opinion that subjecting him to a back-and-forth battle of accusations between mom and dad would be even worse; and he has therefore accepted the reality of the situation with the hope that my brother would come to know the truth with the passage of time. When the rest of my family (me, my wife, siblings, mother, aunts, uncles, and grandmother) discuss this sad state of affairs, we all agree that my brother’s emotional well-being is paramount, and so we have all bitten our tongues even when Susan Stanton targeted us. We have bitten our tongues even though we are painfully aware that she is not doing my brother any favors when it comes to protecting his emotions -- and even though we are painfully aware that her depiction of my father’s character is grossly inaccurate.

But like I said above, she has now escalated her war from one of harassment and defamation to one of threats, and has done so in a public forum. Plus, she chose to place my brother in the public eye when she had a Tampa news program say his name and show his photograph on television, and when she had his name and photograph published in the Tampa Bay Times. So now all bets are off and my family will no longer fight with its hands tied behind its back.

Another great quote from Lincoln was when he observed, “Are you not over-cautious when you assume that you can not do what the enemy is constantly doing?” Nobody in my family likes to think of individual human beings as enemies, but Susan Stanton, by her words and deeds, has made it clear that she considers us enemies even though we have never done a thing to her except leave her alone. Well, now we are fighting back and will not permit wrong to prevail.

The purpose of this blog is to tell the whole story, rather than the warped version told by Susan Stanton and the selectively out-of-context morsels which have appeared in the press. In the spirit of Abe Lincoln’s quotes, this blog will use truth to fight slander and will ensure that Susan Stanton no longer has free reign to say and do whatever she pleases without fear of rebuttal.

The coming posts will tell the story and let the public know things they otherwise wouldn’t. The reason these things would not otherwise be known is simple: Susan Stanton does not want them to be known. Hopefully, airing them will compel her to put an end to her ignorant allegations and her machinations against innocent people. But I won’t hold my breath.

If you would like to contribute any information, you may do so at erikaandjohn(at)gmail(dot)com.